Interviewee: Anchung, 0:10 what's wrong? Do you need help? Go get the stop sign.
I've found the stop sign to be really useful. I've seen kids use this instead of hitting or throwing or being upset. When children have a conflict, they can go get that stop sign and it's something concrete for them to hold out and show it to their friend and say, “Stop,” and then express how they feel.
Show it to Louis.
Male Voice 1: Stop it.
Interviewee: Stop it. How do you feel, Anchung? Are you angry? You look angry. Is that true?
Male Voice 1: Yeah.
Interviewee: Well, tell him how you feel.
The friend then has an opportunity to say how they feel.
How do you feel, Luis?
Male Voice 2: Sad.
Interviewee: Sad? Luis is sad.
They can work on a resolution together.
Maybe you need to take a turn. Can you wait and take a turn? Would that be okay with you? Okay. Good.
The stop sign itself just solves a lotta the problems right away. If they can say, “Oh, something just happened that made me angry,” and they can say that to another person, a lotta times that's the end of the conflict.
Thank you. I like the way you guys worked that out.
The idea of the stop sign is not just about problem solving, but about creating a situation where a child can communicate their emotions and their needs.